What I packed for Hospital Birth #2!

For Wiggles hospital birth, I ended up bringing SO much stuff, and so little of it I used. So with Miah, I'm packing light! 

My packing is split up into three bags. Wiggles overnight bag(Flash is going back to his moms if we go into labour when we have him.), my bag, and the baby bag. 

Each bag is split up into pre-pack, and a list of things to grab before we leave, which is then pinned onto the bag so we can grab it as we leave the house. 

Wiggles Bag

Prepack

- Two sleepers

- Two outfits

- Sweater

- 10 diapers

- Wipes

- Diaper Cream

- Tylenol

"Running List"

- Can of Formula

- 4 Bottles

- Bag of Milk

- Snacks

- 2 x Pacifiers

My bag

**I ended up using none of this, as I left the hospital right after I gave birth.
I maybe used the fuzzy socks, and that was pretty much it. I guess the change of clothes.

Prepack

- New package of underwear 

(I loved the hipsters fit ones from Walmart.) 

- Shampoo, soap, deodorant, hair brush, tooth brush, and tooth paste. 

- Sweater 

(Something with a zipper for nursing.)

- 1 pair of fuzzy socks, 2 normal pairs. 

- 2 books. 

- Hair elastics. 

- Cell phone

(the service is turned off, I use it as an ipod.) 

- Going home outfit 

(Screw pretty. My old PJ pants, a big baggy sweater and a maternity shirt is perfect.) 

- Breast Pads

- Change of clothes for after birth.

- Change of clothes for Caleb.  

"Running List"

- Laptop and Charger

- Calebs cellphone/Charger

Baby Bag

All of this was pre-pack. 

We used the NB outfit when we went home, and the receiving and fuzzy blankets, that's all out of this bag. 

- 1 Newborn going home outfit 

- 1 0-3 months going home outfit

- 1 light sleeper 0-3 months

- 1 fuzzy sleeper 0-3 months

- NB onesie and leggings

- 1 fuzzy NB sleeper

- 2 receiving blankets 

- 2 fuzzy blankets

- Carseat

- 1 pair socks

* I don't bring shampoo, baby soap, diapers, formula... anything like that. The hospital provides that. I also strip the room before we leave. 

It seems like a lot, but it's really not once it's all laid out! 

Good luck! 

- Adele

Miah's Birthstory!

Hey y'all! So I'm finally at the point (a month later) where Miah's birth no longer traumatizes me, so I can write about it! :D (You will probably never hear Wiggles' birth story, cause I don't want to traumatize people.)

First off, no pictures, at least not of me. Cause no one wants to see me in labour. It's not a pretty sight. Not even my husband wants to see me labour, and he has to love me whatever I look like. 

So with Miah... I was huge. I don't have any pictures of myself, but oh I wish I did, just to prove that the human body can stretch to proportions that large. I was easily twice as big as I was with Wiggles. The clothes I fit at 9 months with her? Stopped fitting at like 5 months with Miah. I was huge, and so I was miserable. I'd been having constant, hard, contractions every 5-10 minutes for about a month, and it was to the point where I couldn't pick up Wiggles because I nearly dropped her every time I had one. 

We went on the 28th to see if there was anything my midwife could do to bring on labour. And I mean anything. I begged her to strip my membranes, break my water... whatever she had to do to make this baby happen now. She just shook her head and said "You're only 38+5, relax, enjoy this! Plus, you are not even close darling." Cervix was way back, very little dilation. I went home, and cried. And by cried, I mean I threw things and then laid on my bed and sobbed because I was so done. 

Finally though, I got over it and went on with my life expecting that I would be waiting weeks before this baby finally made his appearance. So Friday and Saturday roll by... nothing. By this point, I'm just giving up on the idea of ever having a baby. I was going to stay pregnant forever, I was convinced. 

So Sunday morning rolls around, and we bundle everyone up, and head out to church. All morning I'd be having contractions per what was becoming the norm. I was uncomfortable, as women usually are at 39 weeks pregnant. We get through church, and I can't sit still. I can't get comfortable no matter what I do. I sit on the pew, I lean forward, I lean on Caleb, I pace the back.. nothing. Can't get comfortable. Whatever, I could never get comfortable at that point. I figured it was nothing. 

We go to Calebs moms every Sunday, so we head over and about halfway through lunch, around 1:30... there it was. A painful contraction. This one felt pretty much like all the other contractions I'd been having for weeks,  so I ignored it. But then 8 minutes later, there was another one. By this point my mother in law, sister in law, and husband have caught on something is going on. Caleb starts timing, and in between 1:30 and 3:00, we go from 8 minutes apart to 5 minutes apart. 

By this time Caleb is like a chicken with his head cut off. I am surprisingly calm. I kid you not, I was a sea of tranquility. And those of you who know me know I am anything but. I calmly call my mom and tell her "So maybe today, I don't think so, but maybe." I am fully in denial. Yupp. No baby. I'm positive. I'm going to pregnant forever, remember? We've thought this was labour twice already, I've had contractions 4 minutes apart for 6 hours before and then they stopped. This wasn't labour, the midwife had said I wasn't anywhere close. 

So we go home, and Flash is bouncing off the walls. He calmly informs me that "Adele, you're in a lot of pain, so I think the baby is coming today." My seven year old knew this was the day before I did. Silly me. 

We drop Flash off at his moms, and then come home again, choosing to forgo night church. We get Wiggles to sleep, and these contractions are only getting worse. Now they're 4 minutes apart and Caleb is begging me to call my midwife and just go to the hospital already. I am stubbornly refusing. This isn't labour, and I refuse to believe it is! I literally screamed this at him as I'm lying on my couch wiggling around in pain from the contractions. He gives up on me calling around 6 and calls himself, putting the phone to my ear after he tells the midwife what's going on. I tell her whats going on, she listens to a contraction and then calmly tells me to give him back the phone. "You're wife is definitely in labour, and I think we should go to the hospital, do you mind if I finish my meal first?" I insist on him saying yes, finish eating, and slowly we get our stuff together and go. All the while, I'm still in denial. 

We drop off Wiggles at a friend from churchs and head to hospital, where they check me. 4 centimeters! I'm in a bit of shock at this point. My exact words were OMGOSH this is actually happening right now.My midwife laughed at me and said "Yupp." We got admitted, just because we weren't sure how last things were gonna progress. The next three hours were boring. Labour is super boring for all you out there who haven't had babies. Seriously, it's just lots of pain, and that's about it. The only thing I have to say about this portion is "The labour ball is your best friend!" Seriously, I loved that thing. Throwing myself over it like a beached whale, bouncing on it, squatting on it... loved it. My husband was a little jealous. I walked a lot during this stage. 

Finally we get to 9:30, and my midwife is starting to ask if I want her to break my water. Why? Because I am having horrible back labour. I can't walk, I can't talk... all I can do is moan in pain and hope it goes away, except I know it won't. This horrible back labour was caused by Miah still being really high in the pelvis. So all my pain was centered in the small of my back. So she gives me the option, using these exact words. "What I am about to ask you if you want to do, could make this so much worse in a good way, or so much worse in a bad way." We opt to wait a bit and see if Miah came down on his own, and finally around 10(and 5 centimeters dilated), I say "Ok, let's do this." They break my water, and then man, transition hit. Just like that, no preemptive kinda contractions... nope, the next one was crazy into transition. 

This is the point where things get... fuzzy. I remember a lot of screaming and trying to focus on the dots on the ceiling and trying to be calm through the most horrible pain of my life... and then I remember them checking me at about 11:15 and begging her to stop touching my cervix cause it hurt... and then they tell me I'm 7 1/2 centimeters. 

... 

I then beg for the epidural, and the nitrous oxide. My husband, like the wonderful husband he is, asks me three times if I really want the epidural, and I say of course I stinkin' well do, what was I thinking going natural! My midwife looks doubtful as she checks me again. "It might be to late." She whispers to my husband, and he says "Good lord, don't tell her that!" She laughs and calls in the nurse to give me the nitrous oxide. They bring in a nearly empty tank, and I drain it in about oh.. three seconds. So they bring in another, and finally, relief! 

The problem is, this stuff makes me jittery man. I can't sit still. So they're trying to get in an IV for the epi... and I won't sit still. Finally my midwife gives up and says "It's to late anyways." So I get no epi, which in the end, was awesome. 

By now it's 11:30 and I'm so loopy on the gas that my midwife actually has to pull it out of my hand, cause I'm taking so much and starving Miah of oxygen. Yes, I loved the gas. 

My midwife checks me again, still 7 1/2. I kid you not, she turned around, took off her gloves, said something to my husband and suddenly I push. There was nothing I could do, I was pushing,  and it was burning. The other midwife yells "She's pushing!" My midwife grabs some gloves, checks me and says "She's ready, baby is crowning." Just like that. 10 minutes, maybe from 7 1/2 to 10 centimeters. Awesome. 

Three pushes. Three of the longest pushes of my entire life, and my son was born. Dude, the ring of fire? People warn you about it.. but man, it's real. But it's not as bad as labour man. Pushing feels great. Pushing was the best part of labour. The pain is going somewhere, and you know that this means it's almost over. This made all the difference for me. 

Anyways. Three pushes, three pushes and then they hand me my son. It was cool actually getting to feel giving birth this time. Last time we had to use forceps, so I never really got to feel it. But with Miah I could feel his head, his shoulders, his  body... I could feel them as they came out. It was cool. They handed him to me and he was perfect. 

He weighed 8 lbs 13 ounces, and was 21 inches long.

I had a small tear(That I yelled at the midwife for touching cause it hurt), but no other damage, which was awesome cause with Wiggles I had a 3 inch episiotomy that I hated the recovery for. 

My husband, bless his wonderful heart, sent my mother in law(Who was there for the birth and apparently yelled at my husband because he wouldn't give me the epidural when I begged her for it, even though it wasn't his fault it was to late. I love her.) to get me a Spicy Thai chicken wrap and a big fries and a coke from McDonalds. Because that's what I crave after labour. McDonalds. With Wiggles it was McDonalds nuggets. That's all I talked about during labour. 

Apparently some point in here Caleb skyped my parents to show them Miah and I, but I have no recollection of this at all. I was to busy letting the nitrous oxide leave my system.

 About 45 minutes later I was walking from the bed to the wheel chair.. around 1 I had my first pee(Which was horrible, but not as bad as I thought it was going to be), and by 2 we were heading home. Yes, home. We originally thought we were going to stay overnight until about 6, get some breakfast, and then go home. But by 2 I was feeling great, Miah was calm and feeding well, and neither Caleb or I was sleeping there, so we opted to go home. Best decision ever. I got a great nights sleep in my own bed, and my midwife came to my house and did all my follow up there, which was wonderful. 

So that's how we brought Miah into the world! It was a wonderful day, and thank God you don't really remember the pain, cause Lord all almighty, women would never have babies again after the first one if we did! 

- Adele

My Experiences : Birth with OB Vs. Birth with Mifewife

I can now happily say I have given birth to two beautiful children, and both were incredibly unique experiences, partially because of who I chose to be my primary care giver in this wonderful time. I hear debate all the time about OB's vs. Midwives, and now that I have experienced both, I'd like to chime in and give my two cents. Because what is a blog for if not to share your viewpoints with everyone. :P 

First off, I want to talk about the things that were similar, and then we'll talk about the things that were different, and whether or not I liked them. 

With both caregivers, MW and OB, I found that my care was thorough. In Canada, they are required to run all the same tests, keep all the same records, and give the same options. I never felt with either care giver that my care lacked in any way. 

... 

That was about were the similarities stopped. 

1. Atmosphere

Right from the moment I stepped into my midwives office... I knew it was different. The waiting room, rather than being a typical waiting room, was filled with comfy wicker chairs and toys for little ones to play with, which was great for Wiggles. At my OB's, they had a tiny waiting room packed with 13 chairs so tightly pressed together it made you feel like a sardine in a can. The atmosphere at the midwives was totally different, and a lot more relaxing, at least to me. 

This also carried over into each caregivers interactions with me personally. I found that I got to actually know my midwife as she was a lot more warm and open, where my OB was in and out and very clinical and never really interested in how I was actually feeling or how things were going beyond me passing my routine tests.

2. Value As Human Being

At the OB, I never felt like my OB really knew me. This was confirmed when she saw me in the emergency room, and was like "I think you're my patient, aren't you? What's your name again?" I was seeing her every week. On the other hand, my midwife called on her holiday off to make sure that Miah had turned from transverse because she knew it was causing me a lot of pain.

3. Explanation of Care

I had the option to refuse any care with a midwife, and had things thoroughly explained to me before I made any choices. This was a huge one for me. 

With my OB, I was put through lots of tests. Glucose tests, GBS swabs, weigh ins, ultrasounds... name it. I never really got solid answers from her about why these things needed to be done. This culminated in my birth, when I was given a 3 inch episiotomy with little or no warning, and no explanation of what it would mean for my long term care or recovery. 

Where as with my midwife... I did all those same tests, but voluntarily. I was given my requisition sheet, and I had the option to go or to not go. They would thoroughly explain the reasons of why I should, and why I might choose not to... and then let me decide. This culminated in while I was in labour with Miah, being thoroughly explained why she thought she should break my water and stop the back labour so I could move on and get the baby out. I was also informed of the risks and the consequences if nothing changed. I felt much more... in control with my midwife. This made me much more relaxed, and much more able to cope with the stress of labour and pregnancy. 

4. Illness Driven VS. Pregnancy Driven 

I found that with my OB, pregnancy was looked at like an illness. A list of 'symptoms' adorned her walls, and she was always looking for something wrong, and honestly seemed to believe that being pregnant was something that needed to be controlled and fixed as much as possible. Not only did this go against my own belief system that pregnancies and babies are a gift from God, and my body was made to do this very special thing... but it stressed me out every time I went there as she listed off all the things that could go wrong at any point. 

With my midwife, I found that my pregnancy was viewed not as a sickness, but as a blessing. It was never assumed that something must be wrong because I was pregnant, never assumed that my 'symptoms' needed to be replaced with medication. There was no pressure to conform to the perfect pregnancy, no feeling that somehow there was impending doom looming around the corner. 

5. Who I Saw

My cities OB's have a system set up that one OB is on call for all the babies born on specific days, and they rotate. Which means you have a 1/12(at least) chance of actually seeing your OB for your birth. Most likely you'll be seen by an OB you have never met before. 

My midwife was there for me every step of the way, and I had no doubt that she, or my choice of other midwife if she was truly unavailable, like at another birth, would be at my birth. 

6. Induction Vs. Natural

When Wiggles was born, I went into the hospital the day after my due date thinking my water might have broken. When the OB on call discovered I was dilated 3 cm, they asked if I wanted to induce. I was an idiot and said yes. This led to an incredibly hard labour. 

With my midwife, even though I was uncomfortable and huge, she explained to me the reason she couldn't even sweep my membrane for the last week, and how my cervix was far back, and how she knew yes, it hurt and yes, I was miserable, but this baby would come in it's own time. He ended up coming three days later, and his labour was so much easier. 

7. Labour

This point should really have it's own post. There's that much to say in here. 

We already addressed who was actually at my birth a little bit, but there was more to it than that. With my OB birth and induction, there were constantly people in the room, checking me, prodding me, making sure the many chords that were attached to me weren't getting tangled... everything. This made it pretty much impossible to move to help the contractions not be so painful, and was very effective at making me feel very small and alone. I labour for 13 hours with Wiggles, 7 of those medicated with the epidural because the pitocin made my contractions so strong that even nitrous oxide(Which was pain relief enough for transition during Miah's birth) wasn't working for pain relief during first stage labour. When I was finally fully dilated, Wiggles wouldn't turn so she came down the birth canal. Instead of telling me to stop pushing, the nurses let me push for 1 1/2 hours before the OB finally came in and said "Why are you still pushing, baby isn't going anywhere." This led to me being so swollen and sore that at 5 weeks postpartum I was still wincing in pain when I sat down. After they had to use forceps to deliver her, Wiggles was taken away from me and I was stitched up, which stressed me out cause all I wanted to do was hold her. 

With my midwife, I labour for several hours at home before we went to the hospital, and when we were there, it was Caleb, my MW, and I in the room. Twice a nurse came in, once to take my blood for a MRSA test, and once to check on Miah after he was born to make sure he was ok caused he had pooped inutero. There was a secondary midwife who was there, which was nice. I never once felt like this was something scary, at least not coming from them. When I was so scared to push without drugs(cause of what it did to me with Wiggles) that I begged for the epidural, my midwife very calmly looked at me and said "It's to late, but you can do this. You are doing so great." An hour later I was pushing and it was such a relief. I wanted to push, and it felt good. not horrible like I expected... anyways. After labour I had no stitches needed, and I got to hold him indefinitely with no pressure to feel like I had to rush to get out of the bed or to give him up for testing. It was wonderful. 

8. Post-Labour

After Wiggles was born, we were stuck in the hospital for 2 days, and until I had a bowel movement, they wouldn't let me leave. It was possibly the most painful and utterly humiliating thing I have ever done to have my bowel and urinary movements tracked by a nurse, for no reason that I knew of. I got some pretty hard pressure from the nurses to give Wiggles formula, and they were adamant about some of the tests that needed to be done, that honestly I didn't feel needed to be done, but I couldn't leave without them. 

With my midwife, we gave birth at 11:23, and I was gone from the hospital by 2:30. There was no reason for us to stick around. I was feeling well enough to walk, and Miah was measuring well... there was no reason for us to stay, and it was SO nice to go home and sleep in our own bed, and eat our own food. 

9. Post-Post Labour

My midwife comes to my house on days 1, 3, 5,  2 weeks, 4 weeks, and 6 weeks, to measure me and baby and make sure everything is ok, plus more if something if felt to be 'off'. This is wonderful as it means we're not leaving the house with two struggling little kids in the cold to go to the office. It also means that I get A LOT more personal care than I ever did post partum with my OB. 

My OB saw me once at 1 week, and once at 6 weeks. Unless I had a serious concern, then I was to go to the hospital. I had to go at 3 days to a maternal care clinic in the hospital, which was an awful lot of walking for a new mom, as it was in the basement and a long way from the parking. I had a public care nurse who came and saw me at 1 week, but all she really did was give me pamphlets on what I should be feeding Wiggles, and lecture me about how I should force her to sleep on her back, even though she hated it and would cry so hard she choked on her own tears everytime we tried to  move her off her front. It was super frustrating that when I felt I might have been getting an infection, or when my healing was going BADLY... I didn't feel I could call my OB. I wouldn't hesitate to call my midwife now. 

Final conclusion: 

I would totally go with a midwife again, assuming I had another low risk pregnancy. OB's are great, but they have a place, and that place is not in a low risk pregnancy. They don't know what to make of it other than treat you like you are high risk, but you aren't. :) I would totally recommend a midwife to any pregnant mom, and natural birth to anyone. Yes, it's kinda scary, but my recovery is so much better, and overall, the pain actually worked out to be less than with pain meds in labour. :) 

In short, this entire post is about why I loved my midwife. XD

Meet 'Miah!

Hey everyone! SO! Baby number three/two? 

(Let's say three, since he's my third child even if only my second birth. :) ) 

He's here! 

'Miah was born on Dec 1/2013 at 11:23 pm, after 10 hours of labour. He weighed 8 pounds, 12 ounces, and was 21 inches long. 

Flash is a beyond excited big brother. Wiggles still isn't sure how to take him yet, but she's getting there. 

Ok, well that's all for now, things are a little hectic here, 3 days post partum and Wiggles gets a flu. Throwing up and diarrhea, while I try to breast feed a newborn. It's an adventure this week. :) 

- Adele

Preparing for baby number two - Scarier and easier the second time.

So Wiggles is 11 months in 3 days. And we are due in 16 days. I'm a little panicked to say the least. 

But wanna know the surprising part? Yes, it's terrifying. I have NO idea how I'm going to meet Wiggles growing needs now that she's running, climbing stairs, and intensely interested in opening cupboards, AND meet the needs of a newborn. No idea. I can barely keep up with Wiggles now. 

But really? That's the only thing I'm worried about. I'm not worried about if I'm going to horribly scar this one for life. I got through one, I can handle another one. In that way, it's so much easier! With your first baby, you spend so much time worrying about if you're gonna be able to be a parent. I worry about that a lot less with this one. How I'm going to split up my time and not die of exhaustion.. yeah, that worry is there, but if that's all I worry about, that's the least of my problems. :) 

I found a lot of lists for how to get prepped for baby number two focused on children aged 2+. Which is hard for me. Because Wiggles is in a lot different place than a two year old is. Wiggles understands some basic commands, and has like... 5 words consistently(Mama, Dada, Bum, Hi, Yeah or Yey.). Trying to explain to her or prep her for the baby in ways that involve her understanding the changes coming is not going to happen. 

As for Flash, I never really got to SEE his baby phase. I first met him when he was three. :) Now that he's eight(Nearly), it's a lot easier on him to understand that a baby is coming and what that means.

So here is my list of how I personally prepared for baby number two when baby number one is still very little!  

1. Teach your toddler to play on their own a little bit. 

I spent a good portion of the last couple months teaching Wiggles to play on her own for at least an hour or two a day. Wiggles is, like a good portion of babies I've seen, is super social and more than happy to spend all her time snuggling or playing peek a boo, or just sopping up the mommy love.  Problem is, when we start breast feeding and there's a new baby who needs to be rocked and played with too, then this will get harder. So for a couple hours a day, I would put Wiggles on the floor, give her some toys, and let her go for it. Unless she hurts herself(It's tough learning to walk folks!), I pretty much let her be. Turns out this was a great idea, cause it directly led to point number two! 

2. Get that baby walking! 

I know SO many who say that life gets harder once baby starts walking. We found the opposite. Wiggles so wanted to be independent and able to go that the second she could start to walk, she did. 8 1/2 months. Running and stair climbing was next. Yes, it meant we had to safety guard all our cupboards, and our stairs... but you know what? I don't have to carry her everywhere, in fact, she gets mad if I do. Not only will this make things easier when the new baby comes, but it makes things easier when my one bathroom is upstairs and I'm the size of a baby orca. >.> Wiggles follows me upstairs and into the bathroom all on her own, I only have to carry her down, which helps my back. 

Seriously, if you can, get your first baby walking! 

3. Get baby number one on a schedule. A solid one. 

This doesn't mean that at 7:45 you get up, 8:00 is breakfast. Nope. Not what I mean. But your baby should have a good structure of things that they do at the same intervals pretty much every day. 

For example. Wiggles gets up around one of two times: 5 when dad wakes up so she can say hi to him, or 6:45 if she doesn't hear his alarm go off. She has a bottle and diaper change as soon as she wakes up, along with some cheerios or other cereal. Then she plays for about an hour, usually on her own. An hour and a half after she wakes up, she's ready for a nap, which is usually about an hour long. I right now use this play time and sleep time to get my dishes done, fold laundry, and get caught up on my internet work. Once she wakes up, we skype with Grandma about once every two days, we play some interactive games like peek a boo, or a passing game, if she's interested. She'll want another bottle about an hour or so after she wakes up from her nap, but no solids. By noon we're back on track most days. She comes up to me and rubs her eyes and sometimes says "Nini.". She gets put in her high chair, and she takes a 2.5 hour nap. This is my real power house part of the day. I make my menu, finish up my spot cleaning, make my grocery list, craft(If I have the time), get a good chunk of my to do list done. She wakes up usually about a 1/2 hour before dad gets home at 2:30. She then eats dinner with us, finger foods of whatever we're eating. Then she's up until about 7 if we're at home, about 9 if we're not. She gets a bottle with bed, and usually there's another one of juice or water thrown in throughout the day that she sips as she feels like. 

This schedule will help a ridiculous amount in the coming months, as long as we can stick to it. Having something stay the same when everything else changes is important.

4. Get out the baby stuff you just put away.

I know, you just dragged this stuff down into storage and now you're draggin' it back up again. Enjoy it, revel in the memories. :) Get that swing your kid hasn't wanted to be strapped into in months out, get out the swaddling blankets and those itty bitty baby clothes. Cry when you think of your first being that small. Get it all set up. Make these changes in phases so as to not overwhelm your firstborn with a sudden change of decor. Start naming these things "Baby swing." Or in our case "Miah's Swing". Wiggles understands that some things are hers, and some things aren't. This is helpful to her to understand that these things aren't hers. 

5. Stock up on those pantry foods!

The last thing you want to worry about after the baby is born is whether or not you have the food you need to feed your family. So stock up before hand. Take $20 out of each of your grocery budgets(I know, it's a lot for me too, but worth it later.) and stock up on things like pasta sauce, pasta, soups, canned beans, dried beans, Kraft dinner, hot dogs... whatever you gotta do to keep your family fed. Plan for lots of 'easy' meals in those first couple weeks after baby is born. 

6. Get your  hospital bag packed/Set up arrangements for baby #1, and pack their bag. 

I struggled with this one. I'm 37 weeks and 4 days.. and still no hospital bag packed. >.> It's kinda like admitting that yes, this is gonna happen, and I'm ready. I'm not ready yet. :P So I'm putting it off. But it's important that you have your bag packed well ahead of time. Make a list of things you'll need in your bag, and then get crackin'! (I'll make a post in the next couple days about what's in my bag). 

You also need to set up with someone to take your first when you go into labour, and pack them an overnight bag. Now, there will be some things in each bag you need to pack kinda as you run out the door. :) Make a list of these that is easy for your partner to understand and clothes pin or safety pin it in an easy to see spot on the bag so he can just grab what's needed and then go. 

7. Have a you night. 

You won't have one for awhile. Remember those first couple months when they feed, poop, and want to snuggle pretty much all the time? There's another one now. :) It's gonna be hard to get time alone. So enlist a baby sitter, or the hubby, and take some you time. Shop(Or window shop), bath, eat a meal you didn't make, snuggle with your husband... whatever you do to have you recharge time. 

8. Go on a date with your husband.

Those first couple months are hard. Spend some time showering your man with love. Chances are he's gonna feel a little pushed aside as you struggle with balancing two babies, physically recovering, and exhaustion. Take him out on a date, make his favourite dinner at home, take all the time you can to snuggle with and touch him. Let him know he's your number one, even if you're the size of an orca. 

9. Take some time with your first. 

Soon there's gonna be two of them to take up your time. Take time to treasure your first. Chances they're gonna be pretty confused and frustrated when the new baby comes. And frankly, they're really little! They need to know that mommy still loves them. Take extra time to really engage with your child. They grow so fast. 

10. Enjoy it. 

So many people seem to forget this(me included). This is an awesome time in your life! You're having another baby! Yes, it's gonna be hard. But what worth doing isn't? You get two little someones to love on, you get to watch your body change and a miracle happen. Remember to enjoy it, even when you're so tired, sore, and frustrated you could cry. God gives joy even in the hard seasons, and there's lots to thankful for! 

Well that's it! That's all I got for now. :) I hope this was helpful! 

- Adele

Finding Fulfillment Gods Way.

Lately I have been seeing a lot of things like this around: 

Find fulfillment in yourself, only you can change you. 

Fulfillment: 10 Steps to loving your life. 

Every change begins with your first step. Be strong enough to take it. 

Fulfillment doesn't come from your partner, it comes from within. 

Or pictures like this: 

Now, at first glance, this looks like not such a bad thing, find your fulfillment in yourself, don't feel you need a partner or friend to be your fulfillment/change your life. 

But there is something deeply wrong with this statement. 

And this sentiment is everywhere in our culture. The 'me' focused attitude. 

I'm telling you right now folks, if you try to find fulfillment in yourself... you never will. Ever. 

Christ is the only way you will find fulfillment. Christ is the only way you will ever find fulfillment in this life. You won't find fulfillment in a husband, in friends, in self actualization, in partying, or in clothing. 

Women are built with deep desires for emotional and social closeness. And we seek to fill this need with people, especially our husbands. We spend years hunting for the 'perfect man', for 'prince charming', only to find that once the shining armor comes off, that Prince Charming is just another guy who farts and has faults... just like everyone else. You try to make it work, but just like you're not perfect, he's not perfect, and something goes missing. Some need of yours is unmet. You decide he can't make you happy, so you leave. 

And that is perfectly acceptable in this world. 

No wonder the divorce rate is so high. 

No man will ever make you fully happy. Ever. 

The way to deal with that is lean on Christ. All of those things you need and want, Christ alone can fill them all. Christ will be the one person who will. 

When you feel like all the world is closing in and you're so alone... lean on Christ, and HE will be the one to fill your every longing. 

- Adele

Thank You Lord.

Thank you Lord for... 

Baby smiles.

The sound of my children playing together.

Late night fire truck rides.

Bedtime prayers.

Playing in the grass. 

Moments of clarity.

Snuggles. 

Family. 

- Adele

Biblical Womanhood Sunday: Appreciating my husband, 51 ways to show him I love him.

(Hey everyone, so this WAS written on Sunday. But then Wiggles got REALLY sick. Long story short, we went to the hospital, she's fine now, but my post is a little late.)

Appreciating my Husband: I fail so badly.

51 ways to show him I love him. 

You see this photo? There is a very specific reason I chose this photo for this post. It's not because I look great in it, or because it's some magical thing my kids did that I think the whole world should gawk at. No, I chose this photo because it, it's little bitty self, a bunch of pixels on a screen, so sums up my husband. 

He's got my daughter in one arm, his arm wrapped around my son with his other.. and his elbow is holding me up from toppling on the floor. And he looks so HAPPY to be right there, being the glue holding us together. 

That is who my husband is. He is the rock every person in my house leans on.

He is the smile on my childrens face everyday at 3:30 when he gets off work. He is play time, and prayer time, and that soft voice after they've been rebuked by his hard voice. He is snuggle time and love. 

For me? He is my rock. My calm in the storm. My voice of reason when my emotional side is out in la-la land ignoring half the facts. He is the one single person who I can honestly say gets me. All of me. Who knows my weaknesses, and who isn't afraid to tell me. The person who looks at me and in one question tears down my facade and sees where I'm struggling, and isn't afraid to poke a bit to get me back on track, especially when it comes to my spiritual walk. 

My husband is, I'm convinced, the entire reason God brought me all the way out to Ontario. Because the person he is making me... needs this man beside her. Not only as her mate, but as her friend, and accountability partner. This man, in all his craziness, draws me closer to the Lord everyday. Like no one else has. Through being with him... my being with Christ has become richer and more deep than any other time in my life. Why? Because HE leans on Christ. His whole world is permeated with the love of Jesus, and he wants nothing more than to see Christ glorified in my life. 

I love that about him. 

Now, here's the funny thing. I find it really hard to tell him these things. I find it really hard to sit down and express these things to him out loud. Sure, I can write them here... but practically putting them into actions is HARD. 

So this is my brainstorm if you'd like, of things to do for my husband to help him feel more appreciated. I'm going to make a list of 51. One every week for a whole year. And I'm going to do them all. Why? Because he deserves to know how much we love him. 

Some of these will involve our children, some not. I'll choose at the beginning of each week which I'm gonna do, and I'll cross them off my list. By this week next year, I'll have done all of them. I'll keep you guys filled in on the progress made. Please note: Not all of these will be things will be things that he will notice at first. Some of these things... are things that will just make his life easier. That's part of this. My husband works hard at a physically intensive job. Doing small things to make his life easier is one way I can show him I love him. 

Some of these are repeated. This is because these are things I know he really appreciates. 

1: Place at least one note a day around the house of things I appreciate about him. 

2: Send the kids to a babysitter for the night, make his favourite meal, plus his favourite dessert, and have us time. 

3: Have a 'I love Daddy' day with Flash and Wiggles. Make handprint Christmas ornaments, and write something they love about their dad on the other side.

4: Don't ask him to do anything the entire week. Let him walk in the house and do nothing but sit. If he offers, say no, he deserves to rest.

5. Enter every contest I can to get spitz(Sports team around here) tickets. Hopefully get some. Surprise him with a sports night for him and I. Don't complain of how long the game is taking. 

** If I can't get tickets, we will watch an nfl(Bengals) game at home, and I will make nachos and cheese, and try to cheer for the right team. XD

6. Make a solid effort to never interrupt him while he is speaking, the entire week. (I'm really bad for this and it's one of his biggest pet peeves.)

7: Have the house clean everyday when he gets home, no matter what it takes. He loves coming home to a clean house.

8: Give him back rubs. Do some research on massage. Give him one every night.

9: Get dressed up. Everyday. Do my makeup, get well dressed, shave, do my hair, everything. If he asks, let him know it's for him. 

10: Make him a coupon book full of favours and things he loves. 

11: Take time to cuddle with him at least once a day. 

12: Praise him verbally at least once a day. 

13: Make his favourite cookies. 

14: Clean the car out while he's at work. 

15: Find ways to touch him. His hand, his back... anything. Be extra aware of touch this week. 

16: Make all three of his favourite meals. have them ready for him when he walks in the door.

17: Don't complain. Let a whole week go by where only pleasantness passes your lips. 

18: Have a wii night with the kids. Talk to the kids before hand and let him choose all the levels and things. 

19: Send the kids to a babysitter for the night, make his favourite meal, plus his favourite dessert, and have us time.

20. Find ways to touch him. His hand, his back... anything. Be extra aware of touch this week.

21: Praise him verbally at least once a day. 

22: Get dressed up. Everyday. Do my makeup, get well dressed, shave, do my hair, everything. If he asks, let him know it's for him. 

23: Give him back rubs. Do some research on massage. Give him one every night.

24: Watch a game with him. Be interested. 

25: Kiss him. Everywhere. Anywhere. Take time at least once a day to kiss him outside of our normal good bye kisses. 

26: Get a babysitter. Have us time, even if that means just sitting on the couch and watching a movie cause we're so exhausted. 

27: Save up the pennies. Take him for dinner on me. 

28: Do a chore he normally does to make your life easier. For me this is laundry. It's hard for me going up and down the stairs while pregnant, so he does it. But he hates laundry. So I'll do it for a week, hopefully getting it all done, so he doesn't have to. 

29: Get up before he does and have breakfast ready before he goes to work. For those of us who are night owls, this one might be a big sacrifice. :)

30: Tell your kids the things you love about him. In front of him, and not. 

31: Clean the entire house as a surprise for him. Enlist the kids if possible, have them make a sign telling Daddy how much they love him. 

32: Let him nap. In fact, insist he naps. At least once this week. :) 

33: Spend a night watching his favourite show. Specifically one you hate. Don't complain, smile and like it. 

34: Don't ask him to do anything all week. Let him just relax. 

35: Let him nap. In fact, insist he naps, at least once this week. 

36: Make his lunches and have them ready for  him everyday this week. Go out of your way to make them special.

37: Praise him verbally at least once a day.

38: Wii night with the kids! 

39: Get dressed up everyday. Let him know it's for him. 

40: Have the kids help making a special meal for him. Set the table nicely, get the kids dressed up, have a meal you all love. Enjoy the night.

41: Take at least an hour every night to simply cuddle with your husband. A little physical touch goes a long way. 

42: Be extra kind. Be very aware of how you are dealing with your husband and children. Don't yell, don't snap. Let kindness permeate your life this week. 

43: Don't complain, let only pleasantness pass your lips this week. 

44: Have the kids make him breakfast in bed. Spend the morning cuddling as a family. Make a backup meal in case the kids meal turns out really bad. :P 

*****WARNING: These next things are sexual in nature. Nothing graphic, but lets be  honest wives out there, our husbands are sexual beings. To neglect these things from this list would be a shame. I debated a long time about putting these in here, but the Bible talks a lot about sex between husbands and wives, and God delights in sex in marriage, so we should too. So here goes.******

45: Initiate sexual activities. There really is no better way to let your husband know you still think he's sexy. 

46. Whisper to him how much you want him. At least ONCE this week. In public is better.

47: Wear something you knew he finds you unbearably sexy in. If this is underthings... let him know you're wearing them in a public place, or while he's at work.

48: Do something in bed you aren't super fond of, but he loves. Revel in it. Learn to enjoy it. Take pleasure in knowing that his pleasure is your pleasure. 

49: Tease him. Touch him intimately through out the day until all he can think about is you. Make sure to follow through at night. 

50: Initiate. 

51: Spend some time honestly talking about your sex life with your husband. Listen, don't take offense if he says something you don't like.

___ 

So there you have it ladies! My list! I'm going to start this next Sunday! I'll let you know how it goes! 

Gender Reveal, Kid #3, Pregnancy, and finally getting excited!

Ok everyone! So we went for ultrasound number 4 last week... and the baby is... A BOY! 

Yey!

Flash and Caleb wanted a boy SO BADLY. I mean when we told Flash that Wiggles was a girl he pouted for 3 days about how he wanted a brother before he got over it and started loving his sister. It's so funny now, cause when he gives me hugs, he gives my stomach one for his brother too. I think he's more excited than I am.

As for how this pregnancy is going, have any other moms out there noticed that with any child but your first, you don't have time to worry or sometimes even notice you're pregnant? Seriously, with the first one, that's all I thought about, was being pregnant. Now I'm so busy running after Wiggles and keeping my house in order, if I have time once a day to maybe do a kick count... I'm lucky. By this time in my first pregnancy I had been to the hospital twice. This time my midwife asks me if anything is wrong and I answer honestly, "If there is, I don't have time to notice.  No blood, so that's good..." She just laughs and says "Yeah, it's like that with the second."

On the other hand, I feel like this entire pregnancy I was living in a haze of "Oh my Gosh... 2 under 1..." And kinda freaking out. Now that I have a name, and can put a 'person' on this little thing that kicks the crap outta my bladder most days... I'm starting to actually look forward to having this baby, as opposed to just dread. Which is super exciting for me. It helps that Flash is so excited, his excitement is catching I tell you!

So so far, everything is good. In the next little bit you're gonna see more posts on labour and baby and getting prepared. We're making all efforts to go naturally with this one, so I'm stressing, so that's where my mind is. :P

- Adele

Getting organized with a family binder!

Lately I have been struggling with keeping up, in case the lack of blogging hasn't been enough of an indication. The good news is it's getting better, but it took a lot of work, and a lot of prayer. 

One big tool for me starting to get organized was my family binder. I finally sat down and made one that is functional for me. I'm going to talk a little about my family binder, but I'm not going to provide printables. Instead, I'm going to show you how I made mine work, and help give you the tools to make one that will work for you. 

I struggled a lot with using others peoples pages. I got bogged down in the sheer amount of pages out there, and it caused my to struggle to put one together.

A couple days ago, I got tired of it, scrapped all the pages I had printed off elsewhere, and set out to make my own. They weren't going to be super pretty, but they would be what I needed. I made a list of the things I would practically use. I wanted this to be a book I could love on, this is the list I came up with. 

- Address Book/Phone Numbers 

Because I don't have a cell phone anymore, and I'm getting tired of getting numbers from my hubby. 

- Budget

Caleb wants me to take over the budget, and this was a necessary page for me. 

- Spending Tracking

I actually ended up making this a cheque book kept in the book in a pocket after some thought. 

- List of Meals

I don't know about you, but when I get to sit down and actually plan my menu... I blank. This is a list of all the meals I can make. Sides, entrees, lunches... the whole bit. Makes menu planning so much easier. Makes it so I don't have to rely on my faulty memory as much. 

- Appointments

This page is a simple list with who/why/where/time. The next page is a card holder with any appointment cards that were given. I'm famous for forgetting appointments, but regular things I don't need reminding of, so I found a full calendar or day planner tedious. This lets me see all my appointments at one glance. 

- Dreamlist

This is the list of the things I want to do in each room. My 'dream list' for each one. Split up into "Now - Cheap", "Later - Cheap", and "Later - Expensive". This is also my brain storm for home decorating and things. It's nice to have some solid ideas. 

- Menu Notebook

This is a normal Hilroy notebook. I put it in there, and I use it to plan my menus in. I hate menu planning sheets, cause I shuffle things so much. I don't mind marking up a notebook. This is also where my grocery lists are. 

That's all folks! It's not very thick, but it's the most functional binder in my house! It doesn't have anything I don't need in it, and it works great for us! 

Here's a sample of what one of my pages looks like! 

See? Super simple and functional! 

Now for choosing your own notebook pages! First off, I recommend, make your own! It's not that hard, use word if you don't mind it not being pretty, and if you want it pretty, use a simple drawing program like GIMP. This allows you to make them how you want them, in a way that makes sense to you. 

Second off, choose what pages will actually work for you. Don't get pressured into putting something into your binder you're not gonna use! Sit down and think about things you struggle with. For me it was scheduling and budgeting. So that's what my binder focuses around. Yours might be around homeschooling, or include things for planning your family! You never know. 

Third off, put them in a place you will use them. This means for me it stays right near my computer, where I can write things down when I think of them, since when I'm at my computer is the only time I'm not chasing Wiggles around, thus the only time I really think. Find the place you think, and keep it near. It'll help you actually use it. 

That's all I have! I'd LOVE to hear your suggestions for family binders! 

- Adele

Back from the dead! Lots going on! Painting!

Hi everyone, so obviously I've been missing for awhile! 

So I feel the need to give explainations, so here it is! 

We bought a house! 

4 bedrooms, semi-detached, but attached to someone from our church, so we couldn't be happier. It's in a great neighborhood, near a lot of our church friends, and still really close to Flash's home with his mom. 

Found out we're expecting baby #3, on Dec 9! 

No news yet on whether it's a boy or girl. July 16. I'll be sure to blog and fill you all in. 

School is finally done! 

Flash is so excited. He was so ready for summer to happen. He has spent every minute he can outside playing on the trampoline that came with the house we bought. 

My church bought a new building and Caleb is doing all the rewiring.... 

it's a lot, trust me. But the building is beautiful, and has a parish on the back for my pastor and his family to stay. Which is lovely. 

See? Busy. Very busy. To top it all off,  on the 18th of this month, I go back to SK for two weeks, and Caleb joins me for the second week. I'm of course taking Wiggles with me... which means I'm flying with a six month old... alone. It's gonna be an adventure. 

So! Now you know why things have been so nuts! Onto more cool things! 

Paint colors! 

I just bought a house, and it needs paint, thought it'll probably be a couple months before we can really paint anything. So I've been on Behr's website... did you know they have this neato thing where you take the paint color you chose and can put it in your room or a sample room? Well, I don't have decent pictures of my new house, so sample rooms it was, but here's what I'm thinkin' so far! 

We have three bedrooms upstairs, a small one that Flash will get to himself, a big one that is currently this horrible shade of bubblegum pink, which will be the girls room, and one that is relatively large and painted brown right now, that will eventually be the boys room. For now Caleb and I are in there until the little ones are old enough to go down stairs on their own. 

Then there's a finished basement (Semi-finished) that Caleb and I will be turning into our bedroom later. :) 

Well here is Flash's Room! All credit for the pictures goes to Behr! 

Flash picked the blue all himself. I picked the beige, and most rooms of the house use it. :) I thought the blue would be super dark, but I actually really like it. 

This is the living room, please note: Caleb actually chose this color! 

The black is our furniture. :) We have black leather couches, and all our accessories and things are black. I LOVE the purple, and I'm really surprised, but Caleb loves it too. 

Originally I was really leaning towards #1, but I love the grey in #2, and I ended up finding an area rug I really like in the white and grey palette, as well as cost efficient curtains, so it looks like that one might win out. It also tones down the purple a lot. 

Now, the kitchen and the living room share a wall, along with the staircase, so we needed a color that matched it... and we chose this one: 

I really like it. :) That same beige is in most of the other rooms, because I decided that I really like it. Our cabinets are all custom make oak, with this really unique finish, and I think it will go very nicely. I'll show pictures of those later. 

The girls room is going this color, again Caleb's choice. 

Originally he was advocating for purple, in fact, the lighter purple in the living room... but when I pulled up this as a possible for our room, he really liked it for the girls room. Ah well, at least my favourite palette got used somewhere in the house... Though I'm not sure what my girls will think of this color once they outgrow princess's. Ah well, that's awhile away. 

As for the other boys room, and my room... we have no idea. -_- We can't agree on a color for our room. We might go the dark blue that Flash has in his room, just because it's the only one we kinda agree on. but who knows. And the other boys room we're gonna leave until other kids eventually move into it. 

The bathroom is this lovely shade of lime green that I adore. I'm not changing it for anything. 

Opinions? 

- Adele

Keeping a Good Attitude When Life with Littles is Hard

You know those days when things just fly by? When nothing seems to go your way, when the house is a disaster, the laundry isn't done, the baby wants to be played with or cuddled, and you just want to have five minutes to yourself, and it hasn't happened in weeks?

The last two weeks have been like this. Wiggles is going through this always wanting to be held and snuggled stage. Which is awesome. Sometimes okay. Mostly I'm just struggling. 

I find myself frustrated and taking it out on those around me more and more. 

And every time I see Flash jump and look at me with those hurt little doe eyes, or Caleb give that little sigh, I feel the spirit pricking me saying 'Why did you talk to him like that. Check your attitude.' I am the first to admit that I should be giving out many more apologies than I have been. 

I have been pouring over my Bible these last couple days, looking for ways to keep a good attitude when everything seems hard, and you know what? The Bible has some super practical answers for me, and for you too!

1. Joy

Proverbs 17: 22

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. 

Joy isn't some mystical emotion that is linked to happiness. No, joy is a choice, and a blessing from God. I can choose to be joyful in my life. You can too. Don't spend your day thinking about how hard your day is. Spend your day joyfully doing your work, playing with your baby, and enjoying every moment. Notice how that word enjoying sounds like you're making it joyful? It's because you are. It's easy to be joyful in the fun times, but having a joyful spirit in the hard times is one of those things we all need to discipline ourselves into learning. 

2. Work for God

Colossians 3:23

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.

There will be days when you get up and say 'I don't want to do this.' We all have them. But then get up, look at yourself in the mirror and say 'I'm working for Christ, and he deserves my best effort today. And so even if I'm tired or frustrated, I will work hard, because Christ deserves my best.'

3. Without Complaining

Philippians 2:14-15

Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.

It is so tempting to complain when things are hard. But this is the opposite of joy, and the only helps to make everyone around you miserable. Turn your thoughts away from complaints, and never let them drip from your lips. You'll be surprised how much this one simple change will change your day. 

4. With Praise

Psalm 150:1-6

Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens! Praise him for his mighty deeds; praise him according to his excellent greatness! Praise him with trumpet sound; praise him with lute and harp! Praise him with tambourine and dance; praise him with strings and pipe! Praise him with sounding cymbals; praise him with loud clashing cymbals!

It might be hard, but find something good to praise God for! This simple change in attitude will make a huge difference. Once you can latch onto one or two great things about your day, then things will go much better. Seriously. 

3. Humility 

Philippians 2:1-3

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 4:2-5

With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call— one Lord, one faith, one baptism.

For me, this is the hardest one on this list. Working with humility is so much more than it sounds. It's honestly in your heart, counting others needs above your own. It's apologizing to your son for your harsh tone, it's giving your husband 45 minutes when he walks in the door to relax, even when you really don't want to. But it's more than even that! It's taking the time to serve them. It's getting your husband that glass of water before he asks, and making sure he's comfortable, because his needs come before your own, and what's more, it's doing these things even when he isn't doing them back. It's doing these things even when they aren't reciprocated, joyfully and without complaint. Humility is a trait and an action that people take their entire lives to learn. But it is an essential discipline of the Christian life! 

Now, I'm preaching to myself here. xD Because I struggle with all these things more than even I admit to myself sometimes. 

Thankfully, I have realized that I don't have to do this alone. The women from my church have almost all, at one point or another, offered to take my darlin' for a couple hours so I can get some much needed time to clean and do things. They remember how hard these months are. Today, for the first time, I took one of them up on it. Tomorrow Wiggles is going home with her for a couple of hours so I can clean my house and take a much needed nap. 

We found about two weeks ago now that we're expecting baby #3! :D Which is awesome. But I had forgotten how tired you are these first couple months of being pregnant. Everything seems to wear me down, and all I want to do is eat fruit and sandwiches. Not kidding, Caleb and I went shopping for specifically those two things yesterday. 

Well, time to go apply these things to my life and clean my house. :D See y'all later, and God bless you! 

- Adele